When many think about divorce with children involved they
get scared, frighten and don’t know what to do. “How can we make this work”, “Will
we hurt the children”, “What if they have negative outcomes”
These are all questions that most parents think about when
deciding on getting a divorce. The question that I think parents most often
forget is, “how do we help our children succeed through this rough time”. To
me, that is one of the most important questions that the parents need to ask. I
believe this to be true because during this time, it will be harder on the
children who don’t understand what is going on compared to the adults.
There are some important tips that parents can use to make
the transition a little easier on the children.
1)
Don’t bad mouth the other parent in front of the kid
2) Keep
rules and routines consistent between homes
3)
Share Birthdays
4)
UNDERSTAND that transition can be tough especially for younger children
5)
Reassure you kid that it wasn’t his/her fault
From this article that I read these are the 5 most important
tips that I believe are important to work on when dealing with children in
divorce. These tips allow children to realize that although mommy and daddy
aren’t together anymore there are going to be few changes in their life. Parents
separating are already a big change for the children but for them to know that
other aspects of their life aren’t going to change makes this process run a
whole lot smoother.
What do you think is the best way for parents to handle
divorce when it comes to their child/children?
I thought that you did a good job with your post, it made me a little sad because it made me think about how many people are getting divorce these days. I personal don't believe in divorce, but it is all around us, so I think the tips you put down are all very good in the scene of helping the children.
ReplyDeleteI think those top 5 are really great for dealing with a divorce. When it comes to families going through a divorce, the parents can often be selfish and insensitive of their children. There's the constant fighting and sly digs at each other, the attempts to keep the child on their side or keeping them from activities with the other parent, and always the sense of guilt the child feels when they are stuck in the middle. I can't think of any better tip. Just seeing the divorces my extended family has gone through, some of my cousins are left with such negative, possible lies of their father, who is a great guy. It's very upsetting.
ReplyDeleteI think you were spot on with the five tips, especially the first one. Usually when parents are getting divorced theres a lot of animosity between the two parents, and sharing that negativity with your child could really put them in a hard position. The child feels like its caught between two parents, each of which they love, and doesn't want to think bad of either of them. Getting your children caught in your own problems I think only hurts the child in the long run.
ReplyDeleteI agree parents should keep in mind those 5 tips you mention. So many parents now a days bad mouth each other. I think it is important to explain to the child that the other parent is still their parent. I may be hard though to keep the rules the same but similar rules will keep the child in a good routine. Making it work and helping the child succeed is a good thing for the parents to focus on. I like this post and the take you took on it.
ReplyDelete